15 posts tagged “being a mom”
My son is learning about consequences. For some reason they never kicked in like they are this week. He doesn't like consequences. He is not happy when he has to face them.
His giant dinosaur puzzle has now been put away for a day. He is mad about it too. Well, I told you to put it away and I gave you 30 minutes to do it too...
Well, I have been awfully busy and I am really missing VOX right now.
Well, I got a consulting gig in late December. Something that was only going to be like 3 days turned into something that's going to be like 3 months with a possibility of extensions. OY MY VEY! I haven't really worked in 3 years so it's weird! I go to meetings and community forums, I have to get dressed in clothes that are kinda nice. It's kinda cool so far but I miss my kids when I'm gone.
What else, been busy with the kids and their karate and dance classes, play dates and the twins club newsletter plus my book club. I'm doing too much!
So I miss y'all...
I need help to help myself. I am not a patient person. I have tried for the last year to be a more patient person, a more gentle and quiet person but I have failed. So for the whatever year in a row, I'm adding that to my list of things I want to do in the New Year... again.
I need to undo my personality and become someone else. How do I do this?
What experience or moment in your life have you learned the most from?
Submitted by AngieK.
Becoming a mother is the single moment I have learned the most from. First, I have learned patience. I'm still learning but I have become a lot more patient since. I learned that there is a love so deep in my heart that I am willing to kill for them. I am not softer because I became a mother (people often say that you become softer) I am harder because I have never loved two people more to be willing to move mountains for.
Being a stay at home mom I get the usual comments about how nice it must be to be able to stay home with my kids and not have to "work". "It's not like you HAVE to do anything all day. You just play and mess around." "It's easy being at home with your kids, it's when you have to work and then deal with the kids is when it's hard." "What do you really do all day?" "Why are you stressed out? You don't work!"
Yes, I actually get those comments. And I remember when I didn't have kids thinking kind of the same thing. I thought, how much easier it must be to be home with your kids, you don't have to leave the house, you can do whatever you want, go to the mall or go to the store or to the park! All you really do is play, eat and take naps. (If I could go back and confront old me, I would kick my own ass.)
Ooooh how I wish all those comments were true.
This is what I do on a regular basis:
I wake up first, go to sleep last, get less sleep, wake up in the middle of the night for any wake ups, sit down to eat last, shower last, cook everything, clean the house, manage any home projects, buy groceries, potty duty, do the daily lessons with the kids (colors, shapes, numbers, alphabet, manners, days, months, time, writing, reading, feelings, etc.), take them to classes that they have, manage their schedules of classes and play dates, volunteer work with the kids, etc. [there's more, i just overwhelmed myself].
Then there are the things I try to do for myself:
Read, go to book club, blog a little, go to the bathroom alone, you know, silly things like that.
I know how hard it is for me. I can only imagine how hard it is for a single working mother. I don't think for a minute that I work harder or have a better idea of motherhood or I am a better parent. The truth is, motherhood is hard. Mothering a child is something you do twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, whether you work outside of the home (which should be what one should say when trying to find out if the woman you're talking to is a stay at home mom, "Do you work outside of the home?") or stay home with the children. Being a mother is hard work. Being a stay at home is work, lots and lots of work. Your bosses are just smaller than your regular boss.
So I was one of those mothers who let my children use pacifiers. I figured they wouldn't like it very much or for very long so let them have it for as long as they needed it. 3 years later we have finally taken the "foofies" away from them. It actually wasn't that hard, knock on wood.
On Friday (the day of their actual birthday) we took the kids to the beach. We have started a tradition of taking the kids to the beach on their birthday. We had a great time. We were only there for a couple of hours and we came home. Then we packed up the bag with foofs and put them in the mail box so that the "Foofie Fairy" could show up and take them to other babies who really need them. They kissed the foofies and said thank you and hugged the bag. It was very emotional. They were not ready to part with their friends...
After a couple of hours the foofie fairy showed up and put a small teddy bear, a balloon and a card in the mailbox for each of them. They were so excited. They named their bears pink foof and blue foof. The card talked about how brave they were and that the babies that received their foofies were very happy.
The first night there was some crying but nothing that we couldn't handle. We hugged them extra, read them an extra book and it was a night. Last night was nothing. They didn't even ask for them. They just went to sleep. We will see how tonight will be.
My babies are becoming big kids right before my eyes. No more foofies.
three years ago today, the most amazing thing happened to me. i became a mama... thank you for sharing our lives here... i am grateful for you all...
I was thinking that I spend a lot of energy being stressed out and complaining about being a stay at home mom. I wanted to clear something up... I love my children. I would give my life for theirs. I love them with every fiber of my being... I just don't want anyone to think otherwise.
I decided yesterday to have better days. To say it out loud and make it a reality. The whole "picture the kind of day you want to have today" thing and make it so. I'm working on it.
Yesterday was a much better day. Today has been even better so far... I will get this strategy to work for me...
Thank you all for your kindness and understanding...
I think that when people are thinking about having a baby they should be required to talk to people who are REAL about being a mom or a dad. You know not just the whole, "OOOOOH babies are so cute and you will be a great mom/dad. You will be blessed and yada yada yada!" Yeh, babies are cute. They are especially adorable when they are laughing, smiling, cooing and SLEEPING. Remember that last one. They are the cutest when they are sleeping. And when they are sleeping, you should be sleeping too. They are NOT so adorable when they are crying. And they do this alot. They are not cute and cuddly when they are poopy. Especially when it's projectile poop (or vomit) or diarrhea. This is the time people usually avoid you like the plague. Even your friends with babies will avoid you because your kid might have something that their kid could catch and that's not going to be good for business.
Something my friends who were parents never ever told me about parenthood (oh sure the "terrible two's" were mentioned but never in any detail) was that at about 2 years old your children will cease to listen to you and they will not even look at you while you talk, praise, chastise or sing to them. They will go from being fantastic eaters to being the kind of eater you counted your lucky stars you didn't have... Yes even their favorite foods will fall victim to the floor. They will begin to do everything you ask them not to do. Climbing banisters, hitting their sibling, spilling their not favorite (anymore) beverage on their clothes, taking their clothes off when you have just spent half an hour trying to get them on, hiding at the very moment you say it's time to leave (for an appointment), talking VERY LOUDLY when you say the words inside voice. Trust me, the list goes on... They will take the primary caregiver for granted. You are no longer welcome to give them baths, feed them a snack (which they hate anyway), take them to the store or play a game with them. Only a person who is not there or who is there less than, you can do these things. And if this just happens to be at, oh, say, 8am (on a Monday morning as Daddy is leaving for work and will be gone for 9 hours, while grandma is going to a casino in Jackson to gamble with her friend for the day), then, they (and you) will have a very very long day.
Okay, I think I'm done now. I have to go get rejected for the millionth time this morning...
I haven't felt very voxy lately,as the title says. I'm unoriginal. I'm actually feeling very low and at times I wish that I could just curl up into a tiny little dot. But then I'm over it...
I am having issues with myself being a stay at home mom. ALOT of that has to do with the fact that my kids are only 2 years old. Actually that's fine, I think the MOST has to do with the fact that there are 2 of them. It's just hard for me. And I know other mother's of twins are thinking, "UGH! Get over it. I can do it!" but this is my reality. I just want to sleep for a month and not wake up.
I was talking to my husband the last night. Apparently I wasn't in a very good mood and he asked why. I said, "I think it's just been from not sleeping well... for the last 2 and a half years."
